If there is ever a movie made about my life, I hope it skips the first 24 days of 2012. Considering I went into the year full of hope and excitement, things have kind of turned right around and drove off in the opposite direction. Yesterday I got the news that my Grandmother had passed away, a little less than a week after I got an email letting me know she had been placed into hospice. I spent yesterday in a bit of a daze. Sad, uncertain who I wanted to see or even tell, and waffling between wanting to hunker into a ball and sob and trying to laughing a bit as I remembered all the good memories. Grammie was one of a kind, and we will all miss her. I woke up today in a better frame of mind, ready to go home and say goodbye with the rest of the family.
So that put the final cap on the start to the year. Since taking down my calendar I've been rejected from a job I was not only really excited about but thought I had nailed the final interview for. I wasn't called back for a second interview at another job I was excited for. I've watched someone I care about a lot have to turn down a great opportunity for a reason that sucked, and not being able to help was really difficult. Another friend got rejected in attempting to pursue a dream, and again, not a damn thing I could do.
A lot of other little things crept in too. I found out I had made a fairly major mistake at work that is taking me a ton of time to fix. My car is acting a little funny, and I killed off a plant.
Ok, the plant thing wasn't that big of a deal, or even that unusual. But you know.
Thankfully good things did happen. I rang the New Year in with a great group of people. Got a cupcake delivery from a friend on a day I needed a hug. I met someone new from Twitter while drinking beer and eating Jucy Lucy's at Matt's, I had a friend over to teach her how to make pizza crust and had a great night doing so, and I attended the wedding of an amazing couple who I could not be happier for.
So I haven't been completely defeated by the first two dozen days of 2012, but I'm not exactly happy about them. So the goal for the next two dozen is to make good things happen, because even though a lot of the not so great things weren't things I could control, it's still up to me to make the good memories that outweigh the not so good memories.